The History of Ol' Rod Trotter

Ya know, it's been a long road. Along the way there's been joy, heartache and a number of questionable connections - some of them online.

But let's start where the startin's good.

Back in the early days, my online gaming was bringing me down. I was stutterin', laggin' and jerkin' and my frame rate was nothin' to write home about.

So I logged off, picked up a guitar and never looked back. That ol' Gretsch and the frustration of high ping led to some of the most heart wrenchin', gut bustin, tear jerkin' songs about online PC gaming ever written, if I do say so myself. It was about then that I realized that I was not alone. I guess a lot of other folks been fighting the online gaming blues, because everywhere I went, more and more folks would come out to listen. Maybe it was something to do with the human condition, or the fact that I mostly played clubs with no cover charge. Either way, I knew that ol' Rod was making a connection.

Eventually the demand for more Trotter got so big I decided to make a record so that everyone have a lil' Rod in their own home. So in late '53, I put together my first band and started laying down tracks for what would become the historic first album by Rod Trotter: Hot Rods and Cold Ping. Well I don't gotta tell you about the impact that little platter of wax had. Enough books been written to cover that subject. Suffice to say - the world needed a little Rod and I was there at the right time.

 

The next couple of years kinda blur by. Seems like I was always onstage, online, or on a tour bus. And things were looking up.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Why I even headlined one of them Las Vegas casinos back in '55. But no matter how many shows I played, or how many songs I sang, I could never get my online gaming speeds up to where I knew they could be. So each spotlight felt a little empty, and each microphone sounded a little tinny, and each guitar seemed just a little bit out of tune. I thought I was doin' it for the music, but the REAL dragon I was chasin' was lower ping.

Well, time goes by, as it often does. and over the next few years I put out 13 more albums, like Swingin' Online with Rod Trotter.

And I kept tourin' around this great country of ours and sang my heart out to anyone who'd listen. Seemed like every day it was just another dressing room, or another stage, or another IP configuration. Days blended together and the next thing ya know ol' Rod finds himself smack dab in the middle of the 1960's with little more than a guitar, a hat and a competition gaming mouse. Sure I had success. I played all the big halls. Why, I even played opening night at the famous Fillmore Midwest in Fish Creek, WI.

But I was not satisfied. I was no longer content to keep churnin' out 2 minute songs lamenting my poor online performance. I wanted to do something bigger. It was at this point that I launched head first into the preproduction for what would be the second most biggest disappointment of my life: my Rock Opera. Sure, by this time I'd been married 3 times and I done enough hard living to scare the stink off a mule, but I was not prepared for the complete emotional wasteland that fate had in store for me. Blinded by ego and the promise of low latency, I threw myself into writing the 4 album opus Winternet, Spring, Summer and Fall. The concept seemed clear to me at the time. Each disc would focus on one season of the year and follow the spiritual awakening of an online gamer as he breaks free from the bonds of poor internet connections and experiences the ultimate nirvana that only unfettered gaming performance can bring. I got as far as a photoshoot for the cover and 3 demos before I had a complete mental breakdown.

At that point, I put down my guitar and my pen. I switched off my PC and I spent the next 5 years getting married two more times and - to my endless shame - playing board games.

Eventually I pulled myself up by my own Cat5 cables and decided that it was time for ol' Rod to make a comeback. I mustered all my strength and drug my bones back into the studio to record the album that would put me back on the charts and get me back into the hearts of the American public. This album became the now historic Of Mouse and Man: Songs by Rod Trotter.

This was the album that made me realize that I could keep searching for better online performance, and that I should never give up. I owe it to the fans. And I owe it to myself. Fast forward a few more years - and wives - and I get a call from the good folks at Bigfoot Networks. Seems this fine group of engineers and product folks had grown up listening to all the old Rod Trotter albums and had dedicated their lives to finding a cure for lackluster gaming connections. They told me about the Killer™ Xeno™ Pro Network Interface Card. They told me how they could lower Ping and Latency while increasing Framerates. They told me that no child will ever grow up in a world where their Internet connection lets them down. And I am not ashamed to tell ya. Ol' Rod shed a tear that day. But don't feel bad for me. Even though one long journey is over. I'm stepping out on a new one. And it'll be a Killer.

Love without latency,
Rod Trotter